It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Jamie: *running through house* UNCLE MICHAEL UNCLE MICHAEL UNCLE MICHAEL!!!!
Michael: OO *runs to Jamie thinking there's trouble*
Jamie: GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT!?!?
Michael: Is everything alright Jamie?!? What's the matter??
Jamie: IT'S DECEMBER UNCLE MICHAEL!!
Michael:...and that's a bad thing?
Jamie: Nooooo, it means it's almost Christmas!! ^^
Michael: *mental facepalm* Oh....right...Christmas...
Jamie: Aren't you excited!?
Michael: Uhh, yeah, of course sweetheart! ^^'
Jamie: So when're putting up the decorations, huh huh huh?!?
Michael: Oo Well we-
Jamie: JAASSSON, ALESHAA, IT'S TIME TO GET THE DECORATIONS OUT!!!!
Michael: Oo But I thought-
Jamie: HURRY UP YOU GUYS SANTA'S NOT GETTIN' ANY YOUNGER!!
Me: *comes downstairs* He's not getting any older either....!
Jamie: Where's Jason??
Me: He's out back sharpening his favourite axe.
Amy: *from the kitchen* Didn't he name his weapons or sumthin' weird like th-
Me: Sybil, Todd, Jenna, Alicia, Ethan, Sadie, Tyler, Michael, Amy, Bella NOT IN A TWILIGHT REFERENCE, and Jamie are his favourites. ^^
Jamie: He named some of his weapons after us?
Me: Yup! He named his machette Pamela though, after his mother.
Amy:...and you know all the names of his weapons whhhyyyyy?
Me: Oo" Because....I...uhh....SO WHERE ARE THESE DECORATIONS AT JAMIE?! ^^"
Jamie: Outside in the shed in the backyard! ^^
Me: *walking to the back door* Wait, why do you have Jason and I do this every year?
Jamie: Because you two are the only ones who will go outside to get them...
Me: Oh yeeaaaah....I forgot, I'm nice like that.... alright, I'll be back! *goes outside* JASON?? WHERE ARE YOU? IT'S TIME TO BREAK THE DECORATIONS OUT!!
Jason: *suddenly behind me* .......! ^^
Me: OO *jumps, startled* AHH! Don't scare me like that!! It's not nice to just sneak up on someone and yell in their ear...!
Jason: -_-+ ............?
Me: Yeah, they're in the shed, come on. *goes to shed* Uhh...I can't get the door open...I think its locked... well I guess I can go get my locksmith kit and-
Jason: *walks over and easily yanks the door off of it's hinges*
Me: Oo....or....you can...do....that too....I guess....
Jason: *throws the door aside* ........
Me: Alright then, let's see what we've got he- *suddenly a roar is heard and a clawed paw swipes at me, scratching my arm**jumps back from it* OWW!!
Jason: Oo .......?!
Me: THERE'S A LION IN THE SHED?! SERIOUSLY!?!? WHY DO WE HAVE A LION?!? AND WHY IS IT IN THE SHED?!
Jason: *quickly shoves door back in place* ..............?
Me: Eh, bleeding a bit, but I'll be alright..... I'll be back. *goes inside* AMANDA?!? AMY?!? It's gotta be one of them two...
Michael: They're upstairs. What happened to your arm? Oo
Me: There's a-
Jamie: DID ONE OF SANTA'S REINDEER EAT IT?!
Me: Oo.....noooo, there's a-
Jamie: WAS IT ONE OF HIS ELVES?!
Me: THAT would be cannibalism though....
Michael: Well considering we live WITH and a cannibal and are surrounded by cannibals n the neighborhood....
Jamie: WAS IT ONE OF SANTA'S STRIPPERS?!?
Me: OO WHOA WAIT WHAT?!? Who told you Santa had Strippers?!?
Jamie: Uncle Freddy did! ^^
Me: -_- Should've expected that one....and what did he SAY about these Strippers?
Jamie: That every year he collects good little boys and girls from all over the world to come live with him for a while and be his special "strippers" so that Santa has something to do when it's not Christmas time! And he gives his favourite strippers lots of money! Uncle Freddy said he'd teach me how to be a good Stripper so that I could go visit Santa and the North Pole and stuff! ^^
Me: Oo.......
Michael:....we've got a new tree topper this year....Krueger's head. *stalks off to find Freddy*
Me: Which one, exactly....?
Jamie: Do you think I'd make a good Stripper?? Hmm?
Me: OO Jamie, remember what we told you about Uncle Freddy?
Jamie: To always say no if he gave me ice cream or candy?
Me:...besides that.
Jamie: To never play a game I've never heard of with him?
Me: Besides that....
Jamie: To never do any odd favours for him without Uncle Michael's permission?
Me: Oo Wow we keep a lot of rules between you two....no, I was talking about the rule to never listen to him.
Jamie: OOOHHH, THAT ONE!! I Remember that one! ^^
Me: So, just so you know, Santa does NOT have any strippers, got it?
Jamie: Are you sure? I mean, Uncle Freddy said-
Me: Remember the rule....
Jamie: Never listen....got it....
Me: Good. ^^ I'll be back down in a bit. Jason's outside taking care of the decoration stuff...I think. Oo *goes upstairs* Amy?...Amanda? You guys up here?
Amanda: *from her room* QUICK AMY GET IT DON'T LET IT LEAVE!!
Amy: I'M TRYING I'M TRYING!!
Me: Oo....Amanda?? *opens door and is instantly attacked by a chicken* MY FACE!! *tries pulling the chicken off*
Amanda: DON'T LET IT PECK YOUR EYES!! THAT'S REALLY BAD IF IT DOES!!
Amy: *comes over and helps me pull it off*
Me: OWOWOWOWOWOWWWWWWW!!
Amy: *finally manages to get it off* THERE! HA! TAKE THAT YOU BACON SHAPED BEAST!!
Me: Oo But it's not even.....
Amanda: *quickly grabs the chicken and shoves it in a thick metal box with a few holes in it, locking the box* THERE! Now I can control it. ^^
Me: Oo Why are you putting the chicken in a big metal-
Amanda: Bioengineering again.
Amy: WE WERE GONNA TRY TO MAKE IT LAY EGGS MADE OF BACON!!
Amanda: But instead it got REALLY mean. Oo
Me:....right then....just ignoring that fact....do you two have anything to do with the Lion in the shed?
Amy: O.O THERE'S A LION IN THE SHED?! But I thought you kept him in your closet!?
Amanda: Well I had to move Tom to the shed to make room for Bernard.
Me: oO Bernard?
Amanda: My abominable snowman I bought off that "Tales from the Crypt" guy. IS TOM OKAY IN THERE?!? I haven't fed him in like a month so I think he might, MIGHT, just be a little bit hungry....
Me: -_- You're...kidding...me...right?
Amy: Well is there a weasel in your pants?
Me: Oo not that I know of...
Amanda: Well have you CHECKED??
Me: Well, no, but I think I'd-
Amy: WELL THEN CHECK!! You never know...
Me: O-o Do I really have to-?
Amy: DO IT!!
Me: Okay okay!!... *checks pants* No weasels, just like I th- *a white rabbit falls out of my left pants leg* .....I'm not even gonna ask.
Amy: DAVID!!! I WONDERED WHERE YOU WENT!! *picks up the rabbit* You know, you missed that really important date....
Me:...uhh....right then....anyways, can you get the Lion out of the shed, Amanda?...PLEASE??
Amanda: I dunno...what's in it for me?
Me: Well...what do you want?
Amanda: Hmm...depends...what's in it for me?
Me: That's...what I was asking you, though.
Amanda: Well I guess it depends on what's in it for me...
Me: But I-
Amy: MAKE UP YOUR MIND SMALL GIRL!! By the way your arm's having a period.
Me: -_- Thank you for informing me...I'll make sure to get it a tampon soon.
Amy: Anytime! ^^
Me: Well, Amanda, will you do it PLEASE? Out of the kindness of your heart?
Amanda: Oo What heart?
Me: The one you keep in the jar on the top shelf with the pink sticker on the lid.
Amanda: OHH, THAT HEART!.....Well I guess, I mean, if that's what my favourite heart wants....
Amy: Yeah, don't wanna piss off the hearts, you might make them spoil.
Amanda: Lemme just get some things out of the closet first. *goes to closet and opens it. Roaring is heard* DOWN BERNARD, DOWN!! NO!! DOWN!! QUIET!! That's a boy...can you hand me my tranquil gun and a few darts for it? *a black case is thrown across the floor* THANKS! *slams door shut and grabs case* I'm ready!
Me: Cool. ^^ *goes downstairs*
Amanda: I'LL BE BACK HEART, DON'T GO ANYWHERE!! *goes downstairs with Amy following*
Us: *goes outside to the shed*
Jason: *holding the door in place, roaring and clawing is heard at the door* Oo" .........!?
Me: Amanda's gonna fix the Lion situation for us. ^^
Amanda: Wait, I'm doing it for you two??
Me: OO NO NO NO, FOR YOUR HEART!! Yeah, your heart, remember??? ^^"
Amy: But you just said-
Me: *points to forest* SQUIRREL!
Amanda: O.O SQUIRREL?! *chases after squirrel*
Me: Oo AMANDA WAIT!!
Amy: Remember, that works on her, not me...?
Me:....oh yeeaaah....well do you know how to work a tranq gun?
Amy: *already loaded and pumping it* HELL YEAH!
Me:....I really should be worried about you....anyways, have at it!
Amy: WITH PLEASURE!! *aims the gun towards me*
Me: OO WAIT WAIT NO I MEANT THE-!!!
Amy: *shoots me in the neck*
Me: Oe I meant...the...l-lion....in...askedadiff...yeberschlafen...*passes out*
Jason: Oo ........
Amy: OHH!! THE LION!! RIGHT!! I forgot about Tom...alright, LEMME AT 'EM JASON!!
Jason: *moves away from the door*
Tom: *breaks the door down and leaps at Amy*
Amy: BONSAIIIII!!! *shoots Tom multiple times in the neck area* *takes a step to the side*
Tom: *hits the ground and passes out almost instantly*
Jason: Oo..............
Amy: NO! I'M NOT A GOOD SHOT!! I'm an epicly amazing shot! ^^
Amanda: *comes back cradeling a black squirrel* ISN'T HE ADORABLE?!
Amy: How do you know it's a he?
Amanda:...*turns it upside down for a moment and looks at it*....ISN'T SHE ADORABLE?!
Jason: *facepalm* ....................?
Amanda: Pff, go for it, Amy and I are gonna play with my new squirrel! GEORGE!!
Amy: But...it's a girl...
Amanda:....GEORGINIA!!
Amy: PERFECT!!
Jason: *grabs me and carries me over his shoulder while he carries decorations from the shed to the house*
Jamie: YAY!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO PUT THESE UP UNCLE MICHAEL!! ^^
Michael: Oo What happened to Alesha? *takes me from Jason*
Jason:...........................................................
Michael:.....I really should be used to that kind of thing now, but I just don't think I ever will be.....she deserves a nice sleep though, she hasn't slept very well lately. *carries me upstairs and lays me in my bed then goes back downstairs* Jamie, love, have you seen Freddy anywhere? I haven't been able to find him anywhere today.
Jamie: Why do you want him?
Michael: I need to give him a piece of my mind...
Jamie: OO NO UNCLE MICHAEL DON'T YOU NEED ALL OF YOUR MIND YOU CAN HAVE I DON'T THINK YOU HAVE MUCH LEFT SO YOU NEED TO KEEP ALL OF YOUR MIND THAT YOU HAVE!!